That, I decided, is the last time that I'm going to assist a Surgeon with a dead Deer.

Yesterday Claire and I went foraging. Firstly we foraged in the Fakenham auction and I obtained another Singer sewing machine for our collection for just £17, then I bought a de-humidifier for £3.  I love the look of the Singer sewing machines, engineering wise they demonstrate Britain at her best and are very pleasant to look at. Alison is planning on carrying out some Quilting workshops and so the machines will come in handy then but in the mean time I am displaying them on the living room window sills. This machine was made between 1910 and 1920.

The de-humidifier is to help dry out the Annex bathroom which is prone to condensation and was another great buy at just £3.

Then in the afternoon we went foraging for more fruit for our jams as I want to create a unique breakfast Preserves menu that my guests can choose from some 15 to 20 jams and jellies. Eventually I hope to sell extra jars to them if they liked what they had for breakfast. I hadn't set that up yet as it will take a year to build up stocks but already I had some guests ask for a jar of our Wild Golden Mirabelle Plumb jam.
Claire and I are trying to make some of the more unusual jams and it was with this in mind that we got on our bikes and peddled around the local country lanes seeking out produce.

We succeeded in gathering Blackberries, Sloes, Rose-hips and thorns in our fingers, wrist and arms! Our hands were a patchy purplely orange. We set back with our goodies to make jam. Claire ended up making the juice today (as I was decorating the Annex) and we will turn that juice into the preserve tomorrow once it has dripped through the Muslin bags that are currently hanging from one of the kitchens wooden beams.
I am sure that Claire wil fill you in with more detail in her Blog at :-   www.thepasturetimes.blogspot.com

Now get this.... one of our biggest problems in being able to sell jams is that the empty glass jars cost, at the best price that we have found, 39p each. However from looking at the internet Alison found a way of getting them much cheaper but perhaps not ethically.....
So off I went to Morrisons and after a few minutes research we selected 6 jars of Morrisons 'Value' pack Lemon curd at only 22p each. I got home and ditched the contents of four of them (keeping two for a Lemon Meringue pie) and washed them all in with the dishwasher. They cleaned up a treat with the labels simply slipping off. The jar lids are generic without any branding on them and all that requires moving (but not essential) is the date code typed on. I was let down by the old Grocers trick of removing dates by spraying hairspray onto them, which used to dissolve them instantly to a runny ink again. No, this time we had to use Claire's nail polish remover.
So that is the cheapest way to buy and obtain a quantity of empty glass jars on the cheap!

Tomorrow we should beable to add two more jams to our menu:

1. Blackberry and Sloe jam

2. Apple (from our garden) and Rose hip jelly

Along with the

3. Fig jam we made yesterday from Fresh Figs from our garden.


People have been foraging for as longs as they have known what is edible out there, it's not stealing unless it is from a plant in some ones garden. Our Golden plumbs are actually by Royal Appointment, well kind of as they come from a car park owned by 'The Crown' and I know that in this case it is not The Crown Pub!
There is a danger of overstepping the mark and I was given a swift reprimand from Claire when we were unable to obtain some Spinach from Morrisons for a specific recipe and I simply suggested that we 'gathered' some leaves from a vast field full of the stuff that we were just passing.
She also tells me that foraging for loose Pigs from the fields is not the done thing either!

That said I can recall many, many years ago my Store Manager in one of the branches of Fine Fare Supermarkets asked me to go and collect a Deer from a surgeon. The story goes that he had knocked it down whilst driving and had asked if our butcher could turn it into joints etc. Well our guy was not keen to do this, especially as it had not been purged yet (bled of its blood and also the guts and stomach etc removed). BUT the brother of our cash office person run a local butchers so it was arranged that I should go and collect the beast from the surgeon and take it to the butchers, returning it in a more user friendly state to the surgeon a few days later.

So I get to the Hospital and ask for the surgeon. Now I kid you not on this next bit, the surgeon appeared in his full green surgeon garb, WITH BLOOD CLEARLY ON HIS ROBE AND HIS FACE MASK HANGING BELOW HIS CHIN and he gives me his car keys pointing out his car and telling me that the Deer was in the boot and to give his keys back to the lady on reception!

The anticipation of what I was going to find within that boot was, I have to admit a little unnerving. Eventually, having reversed my old Hillman Avenger up to his Mercedes I tentatively unlocked the boot and slightly opened it fully expecting a mass of antlers to cascade out of it. Nothing so far, so I opened it a little more, then a bit further until I could see a beautiful little Bambi laying in the trunk, quite dead. I thought the best method was to grab it by its feet and with the hind feet in the left hand and the front feet in the right hand I took a quick look around, to check no one was observing me,  and lifted with all my might swinging the animal around to my boot and dropping it in. The head flopped outside the car and the tongue flopped out of the head just as a dog does when they are able to stick their heads out of the car window. I had to man handle the animal so that I could squeeze the head in. It did not look very dignified.

As I looked at the forlorn creature I saw two fairly roundish holes and whilst I am no accident expert. Well that is not true after several car crashes and road kills that include many pigeons (one even exploded on impact when it hit my bike carrier, I have never seen so many feathers), a robin (although in truth that was more consumed by my car as I found it right inside the engines air filter), a blue Tit (which must have flown straight into my front grill and it still had its wings fully open , I caught it mid-flight), a cat (very sad about that and a story for another day), and two Deers (the second of which hit with such impact that Claire could not get out of the car on her side and the animal quite literally flew some 8' high and over a hedge).

Where was I?  Oh yes I'm no expert on accidents involving animals......  Well I wasn't then, back in the 80's but I suspect that the Deer didn't quite meet its end as described.  However I delivered the Deer to the butcher and a few days later the Venison back to the Surgeon. And... after all that all I got was a thank you not even a bloody joint of Venison! That, I decided, is the last time that I'm going to assist a Surgeon with a dead Deer.

And do you know what? I have stuck with that promise for the last 25 years!